Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Safe in the arms of Jesus

It is with such heavy hearts that I write these words. We found out earlier today that our baby has gone on to Heaven, sometime a few weeks ago. Our baby is gone. Our baby is gone. Gone. We won't be bringing home a little one from the hospital in October. We won't be celebrating Thanksgiving by passing around a cooing infant. Christmas will be disappointing, yet again. Our sweet nursery will continue to remain empty and our arms ache yet again to hold and comfort our babies. Molly's doorway will mean more to us as we mourn another baby.

We go back for another ultrasound at 3 today to confirm that our baby really is gone. After that we are faced with such decisions as to do a D&C or to go through an induced labor and deliver our baby as we did Molly. Pray for us as we sort through the pros and cons and make a decision we don't want to make.

There will be tests run and things done to determine the cause of death as well as the gender of our precious one. We will name our baby and mourn him or her as we mourn Molly. Pray that we will be able to see our baby and mourn him or her for a few moments in our care.

"With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall." Psalm 18:29

Psalm 23.. especially verse 4 "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."

Psalm 27:13-14 "I am STILL confident of this: I WILL see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. [We WILL] Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."

And so we wait. We wait yet again for the Lord to reveal His plan and goodness to us in the land of the living and in the valley of the shadow of death. Our sweet Molly has ushered her baby brother or sister into the presence of the Almighty God. I am so glad they are together and so grieved that we have been given this cup, yet again.

Pray for us.

33 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am so so sorry for your loss. I can't understand how hard this must be. I will faithfully keep all of you in my prayers. I love you both, let me know if there is anything that I can do to help.
-Drew Futch

Kim Jones said...

All I can say is that you knew. A mom always knows. I am so sorry that you have to go through yet another loss. I am so glad you will name your little one and try to deliver if possible. I will pray for you both as you go through these next steps. I am crying with you today. You are both so dear to my heart. All our love to you both.

Linds said...

Becca I am so sorry for your loss. We will be praying for you and Jake most definitely.

Wendi Cupp said...

Oh, Becca...I am so so sorry to hear this. Know that you are being prayed for. I pray for Jesus to wrap his arms around you both and carry you. I am so sorry. Love you.

cindy lou-who said...

Becca, I am so sad by this news. I really have no words to say except I love you and I know God is good and is with you. This makes me long for immortality all the more. We are "pressed but not crushed...perplexed but not in despair."

The Trone's: James, Misty, and Bella Grace said...

We are praying constantly for you..

Laura said...

Praying...there are no words.

Shawna said...

There are no words. I love you and ache for you.

Anonymous said...

Jesus is holding both of you as he holds your baby in his Arms.I wish we could just make the pain go away. We love you and are praying for your family.
Castanos

Boonies in the Boonies said...

Oh sweet girl, I am so sorry for your loss. You are so amazingly strong and I am in awe of your faithfulness. I will continue to pray for you and your sweet family.
Love,
Rebekah Davis Boone
Bryant, AR

Angie & Scott said...

We are so very sorry, Rebecca and Jacob, for the loss of this little one whom you so love.

Kristin's Chronicles said...

Becca, we are praying for your family. We love you and will continue to pray.

Kelsea said...

My heart aches; I will continue in prayer for you guys. I am so sorry.

Jennie Allen said...

We are praying and grieving. Oh we are so sorry! We are so sorry.

Rachel said...

I'm so sorry! While no situation is the same (or emotions for that matter), I understand a little after losing a baby we named Jeremiah (Jeremiah 33:3)in February, only 4 1/2 months after losing Felicity. I pray for God's comfort for you as you being grieving another little one. I long for the day when there will be no more tears or sorrow or weeping.

Andressa said...
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Katie Peterson said...

My heart is heavy with sadness. May God hold you and comfort you as you grieve, and give you strength and wisdom to deal with the days ahead.

Cyndi said...

So young you are to be taken to the bottom of life. God must have extraordinary plans for you and Jake.

Pressing on with you to the eternal weight of glory,
Cyndi
FamilyLife

Jenni said...

becca and jake, our hearts are so heavy as we read about your sweet baby. We are praying that the Lord wraps His loving arms around you as you mourn this loss.

Anonymous said...

Rebecca and Jake... I am so sorry for the loss of your little baby. I keep hearing the words, God is good and I trust him playing over and over in my mind. I just cannot believe you have to go through all this again. I love you guys and I will be praying for you.
Trisha

Anonymous said...

I am so very sorry to hear this. I heard about it thru Samuel on facebook. I had a m/c at about 10.5 weeks and, after much consideration and talking with other women, I had a d & e. Please contact me if you have any questions about this procedure. (I'm sure you have multiple people to talk to that have had this done, but just in case..) Samuel has my info.
Ellie

Kori said...

I know I am simply echoing others here, but I am praying for you. I have no words...no words.

Corie said...

Praying!

Lori said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I heard your story at church on Sunday and I am a fried of Krista Morstad's which is how I found out about this devastating news. I am praying for you as you go through this all over again.

Anonymous said...

Rebecca,
I was reading Joni's book, When God Weeps, last night. To paraphrase, Suffering isn't just to make us stronger, full of patience and endurance. That isn't the end. god is the end." To God be the Glory.
Prayers and comfort to you,
Elaine at FamilyLife

Tiffany Rupp said...

Yesterday when I found out this news, we were getting ready to lay a memorial stone to our very own little one who was born into the arms of Jesus alomst a month ago. I cry for my baby. I cry for your two. I'm praying for you and your husband and your family.

Tiffany Rupp

Jennifer & Kevin Grant said...

We are crying with you and praying for you. Love you!

Rebecca (Sam's wife) said...

Becca~ I am so sorry to read about this. God has great plans for you both...

Elaine said...

Rebecca- I'm so sorry for your loss! You and Jake are in my prayers.

Emily B said...

Praying for you two right now. Though I've not experienced what you went through with Molly, I have 4 babies in Heaven, and I ache for you. Many, many prayers on your behalf.

Megan said...

I am so so sorry and I am praying for you all. I randomly stumbled upon your blog through another blog and I am a Family Life Today listener! I am praying hard for y'all.

Tara Tooley said...

We love you guys. You are a witness to thousands. Our prayers and tears are with you. Your faith journey is a very special one to me. I can't imagine how proud Jesus must be when he looks upon you two .... your unwaivering faith that your lives and the lives of Molly and your little sweet pea are in his sweet special loving caring hands. You guys are my heros! Tara

Tara Tooley said...
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