Monday, September 8, 2008
Tears of others
"The hurt will never go away, but it will get easier," a sweet man spoke through fresh tears after seeing pictures of Molly on my phone. I was at a wedding in Loveland for a friend of mine where I met the parents of a friend of mine on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ. Sitting in the church waiting for the wedding to start, my friend Jessica asks me how I am doing, and listens with a tender heart as I share with her what I tell everyone. It's one day at a time, one foot forward as we continue to grieve and mourn our loss of sweet Molly. She tells me next that she has new perspective for what we are going through because her parents lost their firstborn son, Dillon, three months before he was supposed to be born.
I meet her parents briefly before the wedding starts and then at the reception her mom comes to sit by me and tells me through tears that she would like to hear more about our Molly. She doesn't say a word about her own loss, just listens as I tell her a brief version of Molly's story. And then I show her pictures from my phone and her husband comes over to look as well. They are precious as they look at just a third of Molly's black and white photos. She gives me the phone back and with tears in her eyes tells me that I'll always be Molly's mommy and how beautiful she is. I am so proud! I don't cry, but instead beam with the biggest smile as I relish in sharing her story and her beautiful pictures to another person.
Jessica's dad stays behind me as his wife goes back to her chair across the table from me. For several seconds I don't realize he's still there wiping his eyes and sniffing. I turn around to thank him for his tears and he kneels by my chair and puts his arm around my shoulders. He tells me he's so sorry for our loss. That it will never go away but that it would get easier. His tears tell me that the pain is still there for him, over 28 years later, and that he knows the pain that I feel more than anyone else at our table. His eyes are bright, even through tears, and he smiles and tells me what I already know about a new perspective on life and heaven.
I love seeing the tears of others. It is so beautiful and dear. Tears communicate so much to us. When people feel free to share their tears with us it tells us that they are walking with us and sharing our burden with us, even though they may have never lost a child.
Tears are sweet. They are gentle and loving. And I love to see the tears of others.