Four Months in the arms of Jesus

Today marks the day that Molly went to be with Jesus just 4 months ago. We were up in Breckenridge with three of Jacob's siblings: Michael, Mark, and Kelli. Michael and Mark were unable to be here when Molly was born, so it was nice to have them out and take them by Molly's doorway for a little visit. We took her some flowers from our yard and just spent a little time by her doorway and talked to the boys about her.

"Her doorway?", you ask. Well, let me tell you all about it. I got the idea from my precious mother in love because there was a poem written about graves being a doorway cut in sod to heaven. Well... I am not doing such a hot job explaining things so I'll just let you read the poem yourself.

By: Calvin Miller

"I once scorned ev'vy fearful thought of death,
When it was but the end of pulse and breath,
But now my eyes have seen that past the pain
There is a world that's waiting to be claimed.
Earthmaker, Holy, let me now depart,
For living's such a temporary art
And dying is but getting dressed for God,
Our graves are merely doorways cut in sod."

I love to visit Molly's doorway because it reminds me of where she is and how she feels no pain and no fear. I also enjoy being near her doorway because it is the last place I was close to her physical body, part of her that I carried and nurtured for so long. I think about her physical body, which we knew for so little. Her long, delicate fingers and larger than normal feet. :) She had beautiful dark hair that was silky and smooth. Her precious lips were sweet to kiss and gaze at as she took each breath. The smooth skin all over was wonderful to touch and caress. She certainly had plenty of admirers.

We miss her and while that seems to be an understatement it also falls short of how much we love her and care for her. Words seem so silly when I try to explain the desires of my mommy heart and all the memories I have of our precious daughter. She is loved and missed more than I knew possible.

Molly, precious baby girl, you are His and in that we rest with assurance and peace. So baby let sweet Jesus hold you, till Mom and Dad can hold you.

We love you,
Mommy and Daddy


Christy said…
can't stop the tears. i love you!
Stacee said…
Love you Becca and I can't wait to meet little Molly one day myself. My heart is with you guys!
Andressa said…
What a lucky little baby to have you guys as a Mommy and Daddy. I hadn't thought of Jesus holding her, but of course He does!
Shawna said…
I love you so much Becca and still hurt for you. I just read the article in World Wide Challenge about Molly yesterday. It brought a fresh set of tears as I remembered back to those days of Molly's life. I cannot wait to meet her and see you with her with our Lord Jesus...may it be soon!!!
Sarah said…
God bless you guys! I just received the copy of World Wide Challenge and read your story in it. Molly's story has brought me to tears twice now since reading about her this past Saturday and I am in awe at the love and grace in you, your husband, and your families. My heart is broken though I see that God has truly been so near to you. I am sure so many have been touched by Molly's story. Molly's pictures are so beautiful. Thanks for sharing your journey with all of us.
jen said…
Thank you for sharing your story in the World Wide Challenge magazine. Even though I won't even pretend to understand the depth of your pain, I wanted to thank you for being so open about your story and your journey. After our 2 miscarriages in 2-1/2 years and still waiting for a little one, your story has been a bit of salve to my heart. The Lord has used you to bless and encourage me. A "Streams in the Desert" entry for this last week talked about Hebrews 12:1 "let us run with patience". It would be easy to sit down and nurse our grief but it is quite another thing to "have a great weight at your heart and still run." I imagine you have to do that constantly. Even though we may never meet on this side of heaven, you are in my prayers and may God bless you and your family.
ellie said…
Hi Rebecca,
I don't really know you and you don't know me. I went to school with Samuel and just really felt urged to write to you. I don't even know how I came upon your blog. I've heard your story through Samuel's writings and friends that are involved with FBC.
I have a dear friend that experienced a similar loss a year ago. I imagine the sadness is, at times, overwhelming. My friend has since done extraordinary things called on by God. She is really a role model and I belive she would say that her marriage is also stronger than ever.
I don't have much to say, sometimes there really are no words, except my heart is breaking thinking about you and praying for you. As many have said before me, you are in my constant prayers too. God bless,
Carolina said…
Hi Becca,
This July our beautiful firstborn son Andrew went to be with Jesus 10 days after he was born. He was born on July 14th and went to be with the Lord July 24th. We had a beautiful pregnancy and we were heartbroken when we found out his brain had lack of oxygen (or perhaps wasn't formed well- still waiting on the results), and he went through similar MRIs and scans, and was put on medication. It was a difficult 10 days, but we know God was with us every step of the way. Your blog has really helped me today and I look forward to more of your postings. I believe Jesus chose our little ones for a purpose so much bigger than we can ever imagine! It is wonderful to experience the depth of His Grace, and I look forward to the day when our hearts are filled with a new song and a new joy here on earth, and I especially look forward to spending eternity in heaven with Jesus and our babies.
Dear Rebecca, looks like I'm not the only one to happen upon your blog! I was on the FamilyLife site doing some research for a Mom's Bible Study and saw "loss of a child" and clicked. Thank you for sharing your honest self on your blog. It's been 5 years since we lost our son Jacob to SIDS at six weeks old and you think you'll never lose the clarity you gain walking through the valley with our amazing God- but yet I found myself in that place in the last few months. So it was a blessing to "walk" through those emotions again- and find myself again ever humbled that He would bring such precious healing.
Thank you,

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